One of the ways to know if a person is ‘the one’ is by having the peace of God or generally just peace of mind. Often times singles are warned not to be with a person who does not bring peace.

How to hear from God

Now just imagine if one tall, dark, handsome and rich guy who also happens to look calm and love the Lord walks into my life with a strong conviction that he was meant for me. Someone who ticks all the boxes and seems to align with my purpose. It will take great spiritual sensitivity to discern whether peace is lacking or not.

Or imagine I got a job with Google today and the package is mad. The type of package that will change my life and those around me, how much peace do you think I will lack? I would probably pray in a way to convince God to let me go. This is because no matter how spiritual a person is, as long as they are in flesh they will be influenced by it sometimes. Hence the reason we are admonished to renew our minds daily in scripture.

When it comes to heart matters, most of our definition of the peace of God is a natural calmness that comes because things seem to be working out as planned. When Jesus was in a boat with His disciples and there was a storm that almost destroyed the boat he was there sleeping.

If you ask me, I will say this was not a very peaceful situation but in what seemed like turmoil Jesus was at rest. He knew they would not die.

The peace of God is not based on the external but comes from the spirit of a man. When they were in the boat, peace of God to a layman would be when the sea was not raging but that was not the case. This is why it is so important to pray about every decision you’re making and not rely on feelings and emotions – especially when it comes to a life partner.

Seed of prayer

Are you in a situation where you are confused about a person? Ask yourself the following:

1) What exactly is God saying?

I am assuming you already have a working relationship with God, if you don’t, it is not too late to start. After accepting Jesus Christ, invite Him in and wait on Him. God has a track record of answering His people. It is either He says yes, no or wait and His supposed silence means something. Don’t say God is silence and carry on with whatever is in your heart

2) How close are you guys?

It is possible you are getting the misleading because this person is constantly in your space. When you talk to a person every day and get their opinions on everything, you may start ‘catching’ feelings. So remove this person from your space a bit and wait. It could be them or it could be not.

3) Is it just an attraction?

The peace you feel could be because this person is very attractive. If that is the case, acknowledge the work of your creator and move on. Most times than not, the leading of a spirit being will not start from the flesh. So, if it started from you noticing a ‘banging body’, it will most likely fade. Attraction in isolation does not make a healthy relationship.

So you like him?

4) Are you in over your head?

This happens when you have had your eyes on this person already and have built a whole life together in your head, so when they make an advancement you see it as a confirmation. The bible says if you have idols in your heart, God will answer you according to those idols. Check yourself because it could be a crush, a fling or a slight obsession. In any case, God is still in the business of mercy. My good friend will say, there is mercy on ground. No matter your situation, God can in His infinite mercy redirect and reposition you.

Just Mercy

5) Do you have peace about the person or the situation surrounding them?

Search yourself deeply to know if the calmness you feel comes because the person is well placed and seems to have a lot going on in life or its the person gan gan. You will live with the person and not his/her curriculum vitae. You would want to spend the rest of your life with a person whose heart is in a good space. If you strip away the money, the position, ministry or the contact they have, would you still choose them.

Remember that the peace of God surpasses all understanding. God may give you peace over a person when it does not makes sense to the physical eye and you may lack peace even when it seems like they are the perfect option. Search deep into your spirit and discern!

In all these things, just rest. It will happen when it will happen. Remember, God is more concerned about your marital life than you are. Rest my dears!

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I easily get lost in good music and a good book. Jesus is my everything and I am a firm believer that there is more to life than what meets the eye. Lets grow shall we?


Jennifer Azubuike · May 12, 2021 at 4:57 am

A fresh reminder to rest and let God. Thanks for sharing.

    Victory · May 12, 2021 at 10:26 pm

    Thank you so much for your comment

Anonymous · May 6, 2021 at 6:13 pm

A song came to mind, “All anxiety bows in the presence of Jesus, the keeper of peace, and peace is a promise he keeps”. So, I’ll always be at peace because Jesus first, not somebody else

    Victory · May 8, 2021 at 8:11 am

    I love this song!! There was a time it was on repeat my dear. Truly Jesus is the only source of peace

Peculiar · May 4, 2021 at 11:38 pm

Someone once said Check for Peace ,Joy and Love when considering a life partner… You’ve expanded on it more for me,This is Informative. Thanks for this.

Anonymous · May 4, 2021 at 3:02 pm

This write-up is full of great lesson. More grace ma’am

    Victory · May 5, 2021 at 8:41 am

    I’m glad. Thank you so much

Debby Osa · May 4, 2021 at 2:30 am

Love, love, love this! Especially the last point. I always say, “There’s a difference between loving a person – and loving your ‘idea’ of the person.”
The Real vs The Ideal.

Well done.

    Victory · May 4, 2021 at 8:22 am

    The real Vs the ideal!! That’s a word right there. Thank you

Smarteejay · May 3, 2021 at 9:30 pm

Dear, You have said it all.. Nice write up. A must read for all singles..More Grace Ma

    Victory · May 3, 2021 at 9:47 pm

    Amen! Thank you so much for commenting ☺️

      Austine · May 3, 2021 at 10:52 pm

      Wow… I’m blown away by this great piece.. One that I haven’t come across in a long while and a must read for singles… God bless you Ma richly and increase your Grace and capacity.

        Victory · May 4, 2021 at 8:20 am

        I’m so glad. Thank you so much for your comment and amen to your prayers

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